So far, marriage has been a downright blessing. We have only been married for 5 months but, I believe I have already discovered a valuable lesson. A few weeks back, Daniel and I went through our first stressful patch of craziness. The stress of moving, Daniel starting a new school semester, his work demanding more of him, me getting and new job, being newly weds in the first place all snuck up on us at once. It was all just a cluster of stressful events one after the other. We had lived in our apartment for 3 weeks and never had a chance to enjoy it over the weekend together. With a little communication we recognized that things were just crazy right now and we really hadn’t had a chance to enjoy very much together, especially our new apartment/city. Even throughout this brief moment of craziness in our lives, we still had a few things that kept us grounded and connected. Three things: Budgeting, Running, and our monthly Anniversary/Unknown Dining date. This is time we spent 100% together (well except when we’re running we never keep pace together) but it is me and him, doing something together. My first real lesson in marriage is that it is extremely important to have “together time” no matter what is going on. No, I am not talking that you both come home from work and sit in front of the TV together. I’m talking doing something together that benefits you as a couple.
For us, budgeting gives us a chance to look at each others needs and talk them over with each other. Do I really need a 60 dollar haircut? or does my car need its oil changed, how much money do we have to spend for going out together? I thank God every day for Daniel’s interest in our money, budget, getting our loans paid off, and asking me my needs as far as spending our money together. When you talk about it and write it all out there is a better understanding of where, when, why, and how you spend your money and it eliminates pointless arguments in the subject of money.
Running. An activity that keeps us somewhat fit and something we both enjoy doing (except lately, hes had to drag me out of the house kicking and screaming) we have even signed up for a couple 5ks together and intend on doing more together throughout the running season. Even though we hardly ever keep pace with each other, its nice to know someone shares an interest and motivates you to be your best and do your best. Motivating each other has been a real treat. I think its a pretty special connection to have.
Eating. Daniel and I love to eat. breakfast, brunch, lunch, dinner, and cool snacks. We love to go out to eat and enjoy a steaming hot plate of food that he doesn’t have to cook and I don’t have to clean afterwards. This is probably my favorite time, is when I am sitting down beside him and sharing a conversation over food we didn’t have to prepare. No stress, no bullcrap, generally we ban cell phones unless we are taking pictures of or food or tagging each other on Facebook. This is why we started our Unknown Dining tour of Georgia after our really awesome experience on our honeymoon. As you (may) know each month on the 8th we pick a restaurant neither of us have ever been to and go together on our “monthaversary” and spend that time critiquing food and enjoying little holes in the wall that we find to be complete gems. Even though I commented on cooking being a pain, I will say that doing it together is a really special time for us, also. Lately I haven’t been a big help but we use to get in the kitchen together and I would chop while he sauteed. This is also time I really enjoy with Dan. Cooking together is always so much fun. We pump up some music and hang out in the kitchen taste testing and laughing.
Trying something new. We have decided to try some new things. This month we have completely made a spontaneous decision to take off to the beach for a weekend to watch our friends band play over St. Pattys day. We probably won’t be making a habit out of monthly spontaneous trips, but I am hoping we do more of this. I love being married and enjoying it with my wonderful husband. We are going to enjoy this time for now, with no straps to tie us down.
How do you and your husband spend quality time together?
Happy Eating! We’re going on our 4th Unknown dining date tonight!